This final impulse isn’t really about one single event but more about my next steps and some reminders for myself, that hopefully help me shape my thesis, since I am kind of lost at the moment.
Instead of moving forward with my thesis I find myself circling, questioning and mostly doubting my current direction. It feels uncomfortable, but maybe this phase is necessary for the whole process, since everyone always says “the journey is the reward”. Up until now I tried to define what my thesis should be, what the outcome should look like and what form it should take, and how can I justify or measure it. I realized the more and harder I tried to answer all of these questions the more pressured I felt. Also, I realized that defining the workpiece kind of in the beginning, blocked me even more because I felt like I already defined a way and I can’t move away from it. Rationally, I know that I can always change the direction, but somehow, I still feel stuck at the moment.
Since I am not 100% happy with my current direction, my next step is a step back. I think I need to go back to a more open and exploratory phase. The process doesn’t need to be linear, and I want to allow myself to also move sidewards not only forwards. I want to explore different topics, topics that I truly care about. But I want to explore them without immediately trying to turn them into a solution asking myself if this would be a good thesis. I want to ask myself more open questions: What excites me? What makes me curious? What topics do I come back to? I think this next phase should be less about creating and more about researching through reading, watching, observing and experimenting and see what resonates with me. I want to spend time writing down thoughts, questions, references or any ideas that come to my mind, without the pressure of turning it into a concept right away.
I need to remind myself that I don’t need to have all the answers right away. For someone who loves to have a clear goal and all the steps that lead me to reach this goal, this feels very unnatural and hard, but maybe this is exactly what I need right now. I need to trust the process and accept uncertainty as part of it. Additionally, going back doesn’t mean going back to zero. The impulses from the past weeks aren’t wasted, they formed a good foundation I can build on if I want to. Now that I finished all my courses, I finally have more time and mental space to really take a step back and sit with some ideas longer, sketch, reflect and finding out what I really want to do. Maybe I just need to narrow down my current idea or maybe I need to go into a completely different direction, but anyways I think my goal right now is to be curious, to explore, to ask questions instead of searching for the perfect thesis.
AI was used to check spelling and grammar.







