by victoria.bremer -

Connection as the opposite of loneliness

Having explored loneliness in depth – what it is, how it’s defined, and how it manifests – I now want to approach the topic from a different angle. Rather than solely asking how we might design loneliness away, we should also consider its opposite: connection. I want to take a closer look at how we can foster connection and community. This perspective could serve as a powerful starting point for design. After all, connection is a basic human need. In one of the best known models of human needs (Maslow’s Pyramid) it is located on the second and third level: social security, love and belonging and sense of connection [1]. This is also backed by the self-determination theory of Deci and Ryan, who propose three basic human needs, one of them being relatedness (feeling socially connected to others) [6]. Just as loneliness can isolate and harm our well-being, connection has the potential to uplift and create belonging.

But what is connection? And what makes it meaningful instead of superficial? Many people nowadays consider themselves well connected. They largely attribute this to connections via technology based mediums like social media. But while this bridges distances, it undermines deep human connections due to digital distractions and overload and lack of crucial elements for meaningful and deep connection.

In a world dominated by digital distractions, fostering meaningful connections requires intentional effort. The ease of digital interaction often leads to diminished presence – multitasking during family time, taking calls on dates, or scrolling through social media instead of engaging with friends. These habits dilute the depth of our relationships. To counter this, we can focus on strategies like prioritizing thoughtful communication, using technology to enhance rather than replace connections, building emotional literacy, practicing presence, and stepping away from devices. By doing so, we can recenter on genuine human connections and enrich our relationships, seeking out quality interactions over digital convenience [3]. This can even mean just short exchanges with people we love to increase wellbeing and make us feel better [2].

„our relationships have broadened in scope yet diminished in depth. In our pursuit of speed and convenience, we’ve inadvertently sacrificed the intentionality and deliberate slowness that enrich connections.“ [3]

There are of course several definitions of connection, each with different focus and intention. I have chosen this one as it considers interaction and fits into the research conducted thus far:
„connection is the dynamic, living tissue that exists between two people when there is some contact between them involving mutual awareness and social interaction. The existence of some interaction means that individuals have affected one another in some way, giving connections a temporal as well as an emotional dimension.“ [7]

In reference to non-places I would like to add this quote:
„Technology makes it easier to connect but often replaces in-person contact with less meaningful interactions. Even the increase in self-service kiosks and checkouts at stores cuts down on small talk with strangers, which can help with feeling connected. The shift to remote work and Zoom calls means we might be seeing our colleagues less, leading to fewer opportunities for socializing.“ [2]

It is however worth mentioning that even small talk can enhance well-being, build relational diversity, and foster belonging. Research shows casual interactions improve mood, energy, and confidence, even for introverts. Overcoming the “liking gap” (underestimating others’ enjoyment of conversations) helps people feel more connected. Techniques include viewing small talk as a “treasure hunt,” using shared surroundings as conversation starters, and moving from surface topics to personal ones. Compliments on unique self-expression or avoiding sensitive topics can deepen interactions. Practicing small talk strengthens social confidence and thereby the feeling of belonging and capability of creating connection [4].

Based on general research and theories on connection, the following summarizes the key elements of genuine human connection:
Emotional Presence – Feeling seen, heard, and understood is critical for connection (active listening and empathy)
Shared Experiences – Shared activities and experiences foster a sense of belonging and mutual understanding
Trust and Vulnerability – Trust allows people to share their true selves, and vulnerability strengthens emotional bonds
Physical Proximity and Touch – Nonverbal communication, such as eye contact, hugs or other forms of physical contact create a sense of closeness (connection is a neuro-biological phenomenon)
Shared Values and Goals – Having common beliefs or working toward shared objectives builds connection
Reciprocity – Giving and receiving support and care create mutual feelings of appreciation and connection

Relevant paper and an extensive look at connection: “The connection prescription: Using the power of social interactions and the deep desire for connectedness to empower health and wellness”

Sources

  1. Maslow, A. H. (1943). A theory of human motivation. Psychological Review, 50(4), 370–396.
    https://doi.org/10.1037/h0054346
  2. D. Henley, “The secret to feeling less lonely in only 8 minutes,” Thrive Global, Apr. 05, 2024. https://community.thriveglobal.com/the-secret-to-feeling-less-lonely-in-only-8-minutes/
  3. C. Steinhorst, “The way people people has forever changed — focuswise,” Focuswise, Mar. 18, 2024. https://www.focuswise.com/blog/from-superficial-to-significant-transforming-how-people-connect-in-the-digital-age
  4. A. Haupt, “7 Ways to Get Better at Small Talk—And Why You Should,” TIME, Jun. 01, 2023. [Online]. Available: https://time.com/6280607/small-talk-tips-benefits/
  5. J. Martino, J. Pegg, and E. P. Frates, “The connection prescription: Using the power of social interactions and the deep desire for connectedness to empower health and wellness,” American Journal of Lifestyle Medicine, vol. 11, no. 6, pp. 466–475, Oct. 2015, doi: 10.1177/1559827615608788.
  6. Deci E L, Ryan RM. Intrinsic Motivation and Self-Determination in Human Behavior. New York, NY: Plenum; 1985
  7. Dutton JE, Heaphy E. The power of high quality connections. In Cameron KS, Dutton JE, Quinn RE, eds. Positive Organizational Scholarship: Foundations of a New Discipline. San Francisco, CA: Berrett-Koehler; 2003:263-278 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/262725459_The_Power_of_High_Quality_Connections

by victoria.bremer -

Loneliness as a human experience

Having already defined and analyzed loneliness I will now take a phenomenological approach in order to gain a more rounded and holistic understanding of the concept. This means looking at the actual experience of what it means, feels and looks like for individuals to be lonely.
This can mean asking how loneliness is experienced physically, how it shapes our experience of time and sense of space, how it affects our relationships with others, our attitude towards other experiences or how loneliness is approached in general (negatively or positively).

Barbara Schellhammer initially sees loneliness as a structural problem and criticizes measures such as the ministry of loneliness as an approach against the loneliness epidemic. They simply treat a symptom, however the fundamental problem and one of the the origins of society’s increasing loneliness lies primarily in the fact that in recent years politicians have cut back on the funding of communal spaces that are essential for community and connection (more on this in Post 5 on Third Places). It raises the question of which loneliness should be addressed at all and clearly shows how loneliness can be a completely different experience for different people in different scenarios: From the lonely senior citizen who is only cared for by robots, to single households who almost exclusively virtually search the internet for a partner or the homeless, uprooted refugee separated from their family [1].

Nicht-Orte (Non-Places)
“Loneliness never exists in itself, but only for someone who experiences it in a very unique way. It results from a history that extends far beyond one’s own, it is rooted in lived time, in specific cultural structures and nests itself stubbornly in certain places” [1]

„[The] weakening of the identity of places to the point where they not only look alike but feel alike and offer the same bland possibilities for experience“ – Edward Relph

The phenomenon of non-places was first described by Marc Augé and describes places, especially in urban areas, that are used monofunctionally (train stations, airports, shopping centers), which is in stark contrast to traditional anthropological places that are full of culture, history, identity, communication and relation [see also: Heterotopia – places with predetermined experience that are restrictive in experience and access, such as retirement homes or hospitals]. These places are often characterized by a functionality that does not promote social contact or interpersonal interaction. They offer little space for the development of individual identity or for genuine connections between people. One reason why non-places are associated with loneliness lies in their temporary and functional nature. They are designed to be transit places where people generally only stay for a short time. This fast-paced, anonymous atmosphere can reinforce feelings of isolation [2]. As a counterpart to this, there is the idea of „in-between places“ (Zwischenorte) that promote community and open up spaces for encounters. The aim is to create spaces that promote openness, dialog and emotional contact, something that is often lost in everyday life [1,4].

Loneliness as a negative experience
Loneliness is often perceived as strange, wrong, shameful, or even taboo. Society frequently associates it with lower status or a personal deficit, creating pressure to avoid being alone. Many feel the need to justify their solitude with excuses like being unwell or having work, as if simply choosing to be alone is unacceptable. This societal stigma stems from deeply ingrained childhood experiences and cultural norms, making it difficult for some to embrace solitude. It’s not just being alone but feeling unwanted, forgotten, or unnecessary, especially by those you value most and often rooted in rejection, exclusion, or abandonment. This form of loneliness is defined by the loss of connections, a longing for companionship, and a sense of invisibility or lack of place. It can have an affect on both mind and body, leading to stress, discomfort, or unhealthy coping mechanisms.
When feeling unseen or misunderstood, loneliness can even occur when surrounded by other people.This can mean feeling isolated in social settings like parties due to superficial interactions or feeling lonely in a close relationship when feeling overlooked or unappreciated, leading to emotional invisibility. Also feeling isolated due to differences like disability, lifestyle, or personal choices can make a person feel lonely. In all cases, loneliness arises from a lack of emotional connection and the pain of feeling unseen or misunderstood, emphasizing the importance of being acknowledged and valued by others. [3]

However, loneliness does not have to be negative – it can even be appreciated or seen as positive when separated from these harmful views.

Loneliness as a positive experience
Loneliness, when chosen or voluntary, can be a source of rest, creativity, and serenity. Unlike painful loneliness, this form is experienced as harmonious, calming, and even empowering. It allows one to connect with oneself, recharge, and reflect. While virtual interactions can reduce feelings of isolation, they lack the embodied richness of real-life interactions. Occupations like reading, crafting, or listening to music can also transform loneliness into a meaningful experience. This positive form of loneliness requires personal strength and the ability to face oneself. 

Over time, one can develop an appreciation for solitude, realizing it is not a sign of inadequacy but a way to connect more deeply with oneself and even enhance future social interactions, as long as you connect with something in some way. [3] The contrast and balance between solitude and connection enhance both: those who embrace solitude can connect openly with others, and healthy relationships enable solitude to become a source of strength and inspiration [1].

Sources

  1. B. Schnellhammer, “Eine phänomenologische Annäherung an die Erfahrung der Einsamkeit”, April 2020, https://www.researchgate.net/publication/340502352_Eine_phanomenologische_Annaherung_an_die_Erfahrung_der_Einsamkeit
  2. M. Augé “Orte und Nicht-Orte”, https://swiki.hfbk-hamburg.de/Medienoekologie/uploads/auge-ortenichtorte.pdf
  3. K. Dahlberg, “The enigmatic phenomenon of loneliness”, July 2009, https://www.researchgate.net/publication/232058607_The_enigmatic_phenomenon_of_loneliness
  4. H. Rosa, “Resonanz”, https://books.google.at/books?hl=en&lr=&id=MUeWCwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PT3&dq=soziologie+der+weltbeziehung&ots=zNQRoPz929&sig=mbBXxjo9zRRTtzeJy4XLK5h8Ho0&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=soziologie%20der%20weltbeziehung&f=false

by victoria.bremer -

Loneliness – a quick overview

„The loneliness epidemic“ – a buzzword that has been coming up more and more in recent years. It seems to be an increasingly relevant topic, which is quite interesting and somewhat paradox, considering the parallel increase of innovative technology for creating connections between millions of people, no matter the time of day or location on the planet. However, something seems to be wrong. Reports show that around a third of the population of industrialized countries are affected by loneliness [1]. The group most affected by loneliness are young adults between 16 and 24 [5] and what is even more concerning – this number has been rising over the past few years [6]. The WHO has even declared loneliness a global public health concern in 2023 and launched and international commission to study the problem [2]. How can loneliness be such a prominent topic and increasing issue, when we are more connected than ever? This makes for an interesting research topic in which I will be asking the question of how interaction design can combat loneliness.

First of all, to better understand the topic of loneliness, the term has to be defined and differentiated from similar ones such as aloneness, solitude and social isolation, as these mean slightly different things. Aloneness and social isolation describe qualitative, objective measures in which an individual has no one around them. More subjective measures include solitude and loneliness. While solitude describes a feeling of voluntary aloneness, which is mostly a positive experience, loneliness is the opposite and describes a negative experience of the state of being alone [3]. There is no one definition of what loneliness is exactly, generally it is agreed that it can be described as the subjective discrepancy between an individual’s existing versus desired social relationships [1]. When looked at more closely, loneliness can be further categorized into three types. Social loneliness means the feeling of isolation from a social network or community. Simply put: the missing sense of belonging. Emotional loneliness describes the sense of lacking close, intimate, emotional connections. Finally, existential loneliness refers to a deeper inner feeling of being fundamentally alone in life. Further categorizations include transient, situational and chronic loneliness [3].

Since loneliness is for the most part a subjective feeling, it can be quite tricky to measure it for studies and observation. One of the most prominent attempts to measure loneliness is the UCLA loneliness scale which has bee revised several times and works like a relatively simple questionnaire [4].

Loneliness has a significant impact on mental and physical health. It can contribute, as well as cause depression. This vicious cycle has a high risk of increasing early mortality. With depression being the most common mental health issue, loneliness is a topic that should not be overlooked, since they are often intertwined [7]. Loneliness can also harm the body physically. Diabetes, autoimmune disorders, cardiovascular diseases, obesity, physiological aging, cancer, poor hearing and overall poor health have been found to be caused by loneliness [1,7]. Addressing loneliness could be an important step in the battle against the mental health crisis and improvement of physical wellbeing.
Besides mental and physical health loneliness can even impact the economy. Poorer work performance and lower educational attainment have been associated with loneliness and its accompanying symptoms. This is estimated to cost employers millions per year due to employee sickness, caring activity, productivity, and voluntary staff turnover [8].

It is clear that we need to better understand the loneliness epidemic in order to work on solutions that bring us together.

Sources

  1. C. Park et al., „The Effect of Loneliness on Distinct Health Outcomes: A Comprehensive Review and Meta-Analysis“, December 2020, doi: https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psychres.2020.113514
  2. „WHO Commission on Social Connection“, World Health Organization [Online], Available: https://www.who.int/groups/commission-on-social-connection, Accessed: December 2024
  3. „Definitions of lonely, isolated, alone, and solitude“, what works wellbeing, [Online], Available: https://whatworkswellbeing.org/resources/definitions-of-lonely-isolated-alone-and-solitude/, Accessed: December 2024
  4. D. Russell, UCL Loneliness Scale, Fetzer Institute, Available: https://fetzer.org/sites/default/files/images/stories/pdf/selfmeasures/Self_Measures_for_Loneliness_and_Interpersonal_Problems_UCLA_LONELINESS.pdf
  5. „16 to 24 year olds are the loneliest generation“, UKOnward, Available: https://www.ukonward.com/data/how-often-do-you-feel-lonely/, Accessed: January 2025
  6. „Community Life Survey 2023/24: Loneliness and support networks“, gov.uk, Available: https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/community-life-survey-202324-annual-publication/community-life-survey-202324-loneliness-and-support-networks–2, December 2024
  7. R. Mushtaq, „Relationship Between Loneliness, Psychiatric Disorders and Physical Health ? A Review on the Psychological Aspects of Loneliness“, September 2014, doi: 10.7860/JCDR/2014/10077.4828
  8. Campaign to End Loneliness, “Facts and Statistics – Campaign to end loneliness,” Campaign to End Loneliness, May 10, 2024. https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/facts-and-statistics/

by victoria.bremer -

Interaction Design, Loneliness and Public Spaces

In an increasingly urbanized and digital world, public spaces are no longer the main place for community and interaction they once were. However, while global connectedness has rapidly increased thanks to modern technology, smartphones and social media many people, despite being surrounded by others, feel disconnected, isolated and lonely. Public spaces, like parks, libraries, and cafés, have always served as places where people come together. But as our lives become more fast-paced and technology-driven, these spaces are not the first choice for seeking connection, with most digital online solutions being more convenient and accessible.

I find the paradox of a rapidly evolving world, where global connectedness and interaction are increasing, yet loneliness is at an all-time high, to be a fascinating premise. It is a topic that – at least to a certain degree – almost everyone is affected by, and understanding what differentiates different kinds of interaction and connection (e.g. online and face to face) will only become more important in the future, especially for interaction designers. I see designing connection and interaction as an important starting point to tackling many different societal issues, loneliness being only one of them.

Interaction design is the practice of designing the way people interact with technology, environments, and most importantly: each other. It therefore offers the potential to rethink how public spaces function. By creating interactive experiences, design can invite people to slow down, engage with their surroundings, and connect with others in creative and meaningful ways.
With the increasing issue of loneliness, the principles of interaction design and the potential of public spaces I want to ask and aim to answer the question how design can combat loneliness by reshaping the way we interact in public spaces.

When diving deeper into the topic of loneliness, several sub-questions arise for further exploration and understanding. To tackle loneliness at its core, it is important to understand what loneliness is exactly and what the root causes are. These foundational questions help define the phenomenon and uncover why it emerges in various contexts. The effects should also be looked at more closely, posing questions such as: What does loneliness do to us? – physically, emotionally, and socially. Especially when it comes to exploring and developing possible solutions exploring the flip side, will be important. Questions like What is connection? How do we connect? and examining the mechanisms of building (meaningful) bonds are important. Researching on a broader scale, learning about basic human needs and how communities are built is another important aspect that should be considered.

More specific topics for interaction design could include reimagining third spaces like parks or cafes to encourage interactions, designing interactive and participatory experiences, or developing digital platforms that prioritize meaningful engagement over superficial connections. Additionally, incorporating haptic and sensory elements, such as touch-based installations or shared experiences, can evoke a stronger feeling of presence and connection. It’s essential to ask whether the spaces we design truly foster connection, and whether technological connectedness actually equals connection – fulfilling our need to be understood and supported. 
Some interesting ideas for design spaces with connection and community in mind have already been implemented. In many cities, including Graz, places like „Repair Cafés“ [1] can be found. These are spaces where people can not only fix their broken items, but also socialize, connect and learn from each other. “Maggie Centers” [2] provide a place for people affected by cancer in which they can come together, talk, connect and bond over workshops and activities.

It is important to keep in mind that loneliness is a very large and hard to grasp topic. There is existing research, however the approaches and understanding of the topic still vary. Even a general consensus on how to define the term itself hasn’t been found. It can mean different things to different people and it can have various root causes, which means a solution could look very different for many people. An interesting approach could therefore be focusing on human needs in terms of social connection, belonging and purpose, which are things that directly contrast loneliness. When working on possible solutions it is important to keep in mind that there is no one cure, since loneliness as well as connection are complex and deeply personal.

In the upcoming blogposts, I will explore the broader topic of loneliness, connection, and community to gain a solid understanding and foundation of the topic. From there, I will investigate more specific elements of the research question by taking a look at spaces and environments that foster social interaction, such as third and fourth spaces, as well as principles of designing for connection and belonging. I will also look at case studies and examples of successful design interventions to draw inspiration. This journey will ideally give valuable insights and opportunities for addressing loneliness through thoughtful and intentional interaction design.

Repair Café: https://www.repaircafe-graz.at/
Maggie Centers: https://www.maggies.org/our-centres/
The UK has recently launched a campaign to end loneliness: https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/
The loneliness lab is a global collective of people and organizations on a mission to design connection: https://www.lonelinesslab.org/